Hand-Knit Sweaters For Koala Bears, Or Strange Emails People Send Us

We often get emails asking us to advertise products and services on our blog. Usually, I send a quick reply back saying "thanks, but no thanks." After all, the person sending the email is generally some peon in a cubicle making peanuts.

But recently, I was tempted to send a more detailed response. Something along the lines of:

"Thank you for your inquiry. Before we proceed with advertising your product in exchange for absolutely no compensation for our time and effort, can you clarify which of our online businesses you were referring to? Was it the one where we sell hand-knit sweaters for koala bears? Or, did you mean our mobile unicorn grooming business?"

It all came about when I received this form email (the highlighting in red is mine).

Let's just dissect this, shall we?

First of all, she says that she came across our >>post<<. Well, the link she provided takes you to >>this page<<, where we have links to various posts on blogging tips and tricks. It's not an actual post.

Next, she says that it was >>super insightful<<. Uh, okay. What exactly did she find insightful about it? It's just a page with a listing of blog posts. Did she find it insightful that I know how to insert hyperlinks? I think what was supposed to happen here is that I'd be so flattered that she called it *insightful* and put a *super* in front of it, that I would jump at the chance of doing her bidding.

Then, she mentions the importance of >>online businesses<< and talks about my >>work<< later on. That's what got me thinking maybe there is some money to be made in hand-knit sweaters for koalas or starting up a mobile unicorn grooming business.

If she had actually looked at our blog for even a nanosecond, she'd probably have figured out that we aren't selling anything.* In fact, we don't monetize our blog.** {Yep, all of this crazy, random nonsense - it's all yours for free.} Something, she'd know if she had read >>this post<< I wrote a couple of years ago about annoying form emails we get from people wanting us to flog their stuff.

Although, maybe she did read that post as she didn't offer any sort of compensation for publicizing their web hosting guide. By the way, I'm pretty sure they make their money by recommending certain web-hosting services. Our share of that profit - zero. Unless, you count the fact that they'd be >>thrilled<< if we helped out as compensation.

Which leads me to the reference to >>web-hosting<<. Yeah, we don't pay anyone to host our site. We do things the cheap and cheerful way around here by using Blogger's free service. No domain, no hosting, nothing. So, why would we be interesting in talking about web-hosting?

What kind of strange, annoying and/or stupid emails or slow mail do you get? If you have a blog, do you monetize it? Ever knit a sweater for a koala bear or brushed a unicorn's mane?

*Disclaimer: In all fairness, I've had a link up here before for the IWSG anthology I had a story published in and I'll do the same when I publish my cozy mystery. So, I guess I am selling stuff. 

**Another Disclaimer: I did try Amazon Affiliates for a while, primarily with links to books I reviewed. We made a whopping $10. We're no longer part of the program. And, by the way, there's absolutely nothing wrong with monetizing your site. If it makes you happy and it works for you, go for it!

You can find links to our other posts on blogging tips & tricks on here.
 
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