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02 November 2016

Ninja Warriors To The Rescue | IWSG





The Insecure Writer's Support Group (IWSG) is a place to share and encourage, where writers can express their doubts and concerns without appearing foolish or weak. It's a great place to mingle with like minded people each month during IWSG day.

Every month there is a question which may prompt folks to share advice, insights, a personal experience or story. Some folks answer the question in their IWSG blog post or let it inspire them if they're struggling with what to say.

This month's question prompt is:

"What is your favorite aspect of being a writer?"

Check out how people have answered this month's question, as well as the other insecurities and writing topics they may have shared by visiting the IWSG sign-up list here. If you want to know how I answered the question, have a read below.

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I've found the secret to writing these IWSG posts - enlist the help of others, like the crew from the Better Homes & Gardens test kitchen and a team of crack researchers from MIT. After all, why do something yourself, when you can get others to do the work for you? My time is much better spent reclining in a hammock and eating bonbons.

For this month's post, J.H. Moncrieff suggested I enlist the help of some ninja warriors. J.H. is one smart lady. After all, what could be better than having a posse of ninja warriors come to my rescue. Not only do they wear cool disguises, they're also super fit and can defeat any foe with spins, kicks and jumps. The last time I tried to do some ninja moves, I pulled a few muscles and had to go back and lie down in my hammock for a few weeks to recover.

Ninja warriors are secretive, so getting in contact with them was a bit tricky. I ended up passing a message along to one of the turtles who live at my marina (and keep me awake all night banging their shells on the hull of my boat, but that's another story). I figure they'd know how to get in touch with the ninjas given the whole teenage mutant ninja turtle thing.

It worked. The next night, a man dressed in dark clothing boarded my boat and whispered down through the hatch, "Psst...the turtles passed your message along. What kind of assistance do you need? Do you need someone assassinated? Or perhaps you need us to spy on someone?"

Killing people? Spying on people? I was starting to think this whole ninja thing was a really bad idea. "Um, no, nothing like that. I just need help answering this month's IWSG question."

He drew out a scary looking dagger and waved it in my face. "What do I look like to you? Some sort of English teacher? I am a ninja warrior!"

The moonlight shining on his dagger made me realize how awfully sharp it was. I started to back down slowly into my boat wishing I had asked the ladies at Better Homes & Gardens for their help again this month. Then I noticed my half-eaten box of bonbons on the chart table.

"Excuse me, Mr. Ninja? Would you like a bonbon?" I asked cautiously holding the box out to him.

"Bonbons! Why didn't you mention these before. I love bonbons!" He lifted up the scarf covering his face and popped a few bonbons in his mouth. "These are delicious!"

I breathed a sigh of relief. "I can give you the recipe if you want. I got it from the team at Better Homes & Gardens."

He wiped chocolate off of his fingers and sat down in the cockpit. "Well in that case, I'll help you with your question. But just this once. Next time you send for me, it better involve death and mayhem."

"No problem," I said. I grabbed a bonbon out of the box before he finished them all. "It's a doozy of a question this month - what's my favorite aspect of being a writer? Any ideas?"

He grabbed the box of bonbons back from me. "That's simple. It's a way for you to capture in writing all of the crazy voices that live in your head and the weird stuff they whisper to you at night. Like me. You don't really think I'm real, do you? A ninja warrior sitting in your boat eating bonbons." He shook his head. "That's bonkers."

While he stuffed the last bonbon in his mouth, a green mist formed all around him. When the mist cleared, he had disappeared and all that was left was an empty bonbon box.

Was he real or not? The voices in my head tell me that he was real and since I've written down an account of my encounter with the ninja warrior, it has to be real, doesn't it?

If you're a writer, what's your favorite aspect of writing? If you're not a writer, share a random fact about yourself, like what you had for breakfast or what you're currently binge watching on TV.

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70 comments:

  1. Heee! What a cute story! :) Next time I need help--or someone assassinated--I'll have to call on the ninjas!

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    1. They're really helpful folks once you get to know them :-)

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  2. Do you have stomach ache? Yes? You ate all the bonbons. No? Your Ninja Warrior is real.

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    1. Your comment made me laugh out loud! That is perfect logic. Of course he was real as I don't have a stomach ache.

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  3. I need a few ninja warriors to help me out. I never realized I need to spend some time in my hammock to lure them in. Thanks for the idea!

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    1. Happy to help :-) Enjoy plenty of time in your hammock and eat lots of bonbons. That's the secret.

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  4. I'm sure he must have been real, surely nobody would ever imagine a ninja warrior using the word 'bonkers'? :D
    (Marvellous - my favourite post of the day)

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    1. Thanks Angela! I was a bit surprised to find ninja warriors used the word "bonkers" too :-)

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  5. HA! Best answer yet. You have to put those crazy voices to work somehow.

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    1. Thanks Tamara! You definitely need to put the crazy voices to work otherwise they get up to all sorts of mischief.

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  6. I so enjoy your writing. Always fun.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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    1. Awww...thanks so much Sandee! That's so sweet!

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  7. Now I know how to get Ninja Warriors...Bonbons. ;)

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    1. Bonbons are pretty much the secret to getting anyone to help you out :-)

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  8. *LOL* Love this! Making a mental note that ninja warriors love chocolates. I do love writing the crazy stuff in my head too. :)

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    1. Thanks Christine! Just goes to show you that everyone loves chocolate, even ninja warriors :-)

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  9. We don't let the tortoises watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. We don't want them to get any ideas.... :)

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    1. Yes, best to keep the tortoises from finding out about the mutant turtles out there :-)

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  10. I've heard it said more than once 'send in the ninjas'. Now I can see how effective that can be. hehehe

    Anna from elements of emaginette

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    1. They are amazingly effective folks to have on your side.

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  11. Hilarious! Not bonkers to me. Ninjas are awesome.
    Better keep those bonbons on hand in case he comes back...

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    1. I think I'm going to have to start stockpiling bonbons :-)

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  12. I'm not sure Ive ever eaten a bonbon and not entirely sure what one is other than people say ladies who read romance eat bonbons. I read romance and I eat quinoa. Stereotypes shattered!

    Also, your ninjas sound like worthwhile ninjas to know.

    Here's my IWSG post for November: YA Author Stephanie Scott

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    1. Bonbons are delicious - you should definitely try one. Quinoa is nice, but bonbons are better :-)

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  13. Ellen, this is too funny!
    I had a good giggle...
    You have a wonderful sense of humor.
    So we are all bonkers then? Well, so be it. LOL
    There's a saying: imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. So a toast to all us bonkers people...we're never boring!
    Happy IWSG Day!

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  14. ROTFLMHO! LOL. That was hilarious! Thank you for the belly laugh.

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  15. That's great! I have a certain fondness for Ninjas, too :)

    And yeah, bonkers to the max. Lots of voices and stories and things bouncing around in my head crying to get out. Write it or get hauled off to the loony bin!

    —Rebecca (aka The Ninja Librarian)
    My IWSG Post

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    1. Glad I'm not the only one with crazy voices in my head :-)

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  16. Bwahahaha! This is the best answer to the question this month!!! I love it! And your idea to use the turtles to get in touch with your mysterious ninja was brilliant. I'll keep that in mind next time I need someone assasi-er-next time I need help with a question.

    Giving life to the voices in my head is my number one reason for writing. Well, that and the fact that saying I'm a writer makes me look less crazy when all those voices start talking and I start talking back.

    Cheers,
    Jen

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  17. LOL! That was epic. I need to call on my secret ninja more often to do things for me. Or is that my time machine so I can manage to do everything myself? ;)

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    1. How about a time machine full of ninjas? Think how much more you could get done.

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  18. Thanks for the entertainment. Is the boat real? Or the bonbons?

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    1. Okay, now I'm not sure what's real. I thought the boat was real, but maybe she isn't.

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  19. I seem to remember a saying from somewhere that if you can imagine something then it it real. Maybe an imaginary character told me that.

    Arlee Bird
    Tossing It Out

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  20. Who doesn't need ninjas? I could make them a to-do list right this second.

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    1. I had no idea how helpful ninjas could be. I'm going to have to ask them for help with lots of other things going forward.

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  21. Of course he was real! Your box of bonbons is empty, isn't it? Love that part of writing! Great post!

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    1. Yay - another vote for the ninja being real. Maybe I'm not crazy after all :-)

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  22. I'd be totally screwed. We never have bonbons in the house. I mean, he was real, right?

    Random fact: I'm a Pinterest junkie and my latest craze is baby fruit bats. They are so adorable.

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    1. Fun - baby fruit bats! I'm going to have to go google them now.

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  23. I need ninjas, but not eating my bonbons. I need those. :)

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    1. It would be better if they ate carrot sticks instead and saved the bonbons for us.

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  24. Sounds to me like your favorite part is...the writing!

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    1. I think you hit the nail on the head. Thanks for popping by!

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  25. Too funny! Loved it! Yes, ditto on the writing! Although, listening to my book on tape, wow, so awesome!

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    1. That must be so amazing to listen to your own book on tape.

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  26. So funny! I hope we meet Mr. Ninja again soon. Getting down the crazy voices onto paper is so fun and so helpful to one's sanity.

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    1. I have a feeling he might make another appearance one of these days.

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  27. I'll go out and buy as many bonbons as it takes... if I can have ninjas help me organize the incredible amount of "stuff" I have to find room, (as well as organized), storage for. It's crazy around here.

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    1. It might be too cold for ninjas in Alaska :-( Hope things get more settled and organized for you soon.

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  28. Love your resource crews. Of course your ninja was real. Great story!

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  29. Those crazy voices definitely need capturing. And yep, you should've opened with bonbons ;)

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    1. I'll remember to open with the bonbons next time :-)

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  30. This is such a great story! You are so funny, Ellen. I totally love your style in stories like this. So funny! Somehow, you manage to incorporate the answer in a perfectly created scenario. That's talent and a sense of humor. Kudos!!

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  31. That's so funny and so imaginative! Thanks for the chuckles!

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    1. If only I could take credit for the imaginative part, but that's all down to the voices in my head.

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  32. Exactly. My muse is a woman dressed in silver lame (can't find the accent mark - pesky work computer!) It is 'lam-ay' but in French. She will not leave me alone and rather than inspiring my creativity tries to take it all for herself. Trust me to get a selfish muse. Dang.

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    1. I love the fact that she wears silver lame. I'm picturing her with some sort of feather boat too. :-)

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  33. Glorious! Absolutely glorious. Great writing, great story, and it made me hungry. All in all a win for everyone involved.

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    1. Thanks Ryan!! My stories always seem to involve food for some reason.

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  34. See, this post just shows that you are a true writer. The ninja warrior felt very real and I felt like I was there in the boat too!

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    1. Aww...thanks for the encouraging words Nick!

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  35. Ellen, I also hear the voices, and have conversations with them.
    Cheers!
    Mary at Play off the Page

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